Chapter 4 The Real Thing

Chapter 4

Love is patient, love is kind.  It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.  It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.  Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.  It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

Corinthians 13: 4-7

Ethan 2 and Anna 6 months

Ethan 2 and Anna 6 months

Hey God it’s me Lori,

Help to give me patience and understanding

and not be quick to anger.

The Real Thing Being a Parent…

So this was it I was a mom what I had waited for all my life was right there in front of me.  I thanked God every night for my baby.  That is not to say that every second of his existence was filled with joy and bliss.  When a baby is young they are pretty, well boring would be the correct word.  The older they get the more interactive, the more fun they become.  I love the baby stage just holding them but six months when they sit up on their own and get close to crawling is the best.  Having one child was so easy he did not have colic or anything to speak of that was abnormal.  He was spoiled rotten at night if he cried I got him out of his crib and held him all night.  Well that got old after 9 months of fatigue and lack of sleep.  So we did the Ferber Method, you know when you let your baby cry for 3 minutes then check on him tell him it’s OK then let him cry for 6 minutes so on and so forth.  Well it took 4 hours the first night for Ethan to finally go to sleep.  It only took about 4 really difficult nights before he learned that when we put him down for the night we would not be picking him back up again.  It’s not an easy method , it about killed me.  I wanted so badly to pick him up and hold him but that’s what had gotten us into that predicament to begin with.  So I had self-control and Aaron saying “it’s OK” as he fell asleep during the crying.

People say the easy part is when they are little well mine are not past the age of 10 yet, and so far I agree.  Don’t get me wrong it is not always easy but when he was a baby I think the hardest part was just the isolation of staying at home with a baby that could not talk.  So most afternoons I would take him for a walk to my parents house for some adult conversation.  I encourage any new moms to join moms groups or find friends that have little ones that stay at home.  You mentally need that connection with the outside world especially if you have a challenging baby.  One with colic of if you just get frustrated easily.  Anytime you feel your frustration level building please put that baby down go to another room count to ten or call someone.  Going outside for fresh air often helps as well.  It is a change of scenery for you and the baby as well.  Just the sound of an adult voice sometimes sets a mom straight again and your patience will return.

The most difficult and trying time I have experienced as a parent yet was when I brought my second baby home from the hospital.  I had a beautiful baby girl Anna.  She did not have colic but I think she was close to it.  She cried loud and often.  The way to get her quiet was to hold her, give her a pacifier and let her listen to running water all at the same time.  Had she been my only child it probably would not have been as taxing.  However, Ethan my first child was 2 years old, potty training and testing the limits of my patience.  I remember being so overwhelmed that I started looking on line for help for parents who had experienced this before.  As always her crying subsided and his stage passed.  I always take solace in the statement “And this too shall pass”.  It is such a comfort to know that all stages and phases will soon turn into a different stage of phase hopefully not as trying but at the least different…

Leave a Reply