As parents in today’s world we walk a fine line. In the past many parents believed in being completely authoritarian. Any questioning was answered with, “BECAUSE I SAID SO THAT’S WHY!” I am not sure how a child learns or grows from a person in control who is not trying to teach but just control. Children have to learn how self regulate, mature, and grow, not be constantly controlled.
In our culture we have the other extreme as well. My child is my best friend we share every thing. I don’t punish her, I party with her and her friends. I would rather her party here at the house and drink (underage at my home) than somewhere else. What!? That is too far the other way.
The question is where is the balance? How do we walk the line without falling off of it? We need to be strong authority figures as good stable, strong role models but not control freaks. We also need to love them and form a relationship with our children but not so intimate that it crosses the line from parent to best buddy with no sense of authority at all. Where is the middle?
We have to teach our children from a young age that we are doing what is best for them. That we as parents have a more objective view of the world and we will care for them and guide them, helping them to learn, grow, and become independent. We also want a close relationship with our children so they know how loved and secure they are in this world.
Every day parents walk a line, hoping we are doing what is best for our children. We are praying that God gives us the guidance, fortitude, and unconditional love to parent well enough for our children to grow and flourish into an independent, responsible, adult child of God, the best parent ever!